What are schema therapy critic modes?
The critic modes, or the parent modes as they used to be called in schema therapy, are the negative thoughts (e.g. you are worthless) and feelings (e.g. self disgust) an individual expresses towards themselves. They are the internalized voice and behaviour of a parent, carer or significant other. Critical messages often relate to the person’s feelings (e.g. your feelings are embarrassing) and needs (other people’s needs are more important than yours).
The critic mode amplifies feelings by piling shame, guilt and pressure onto the individual, and blocks healthy soothing of feelings by denying and invalidating needs.
One goal of schema therapy is to reduce the power of the critic mode and limit its influence, allowing for healthy expression of feelings and needs.
The Punitive Critic Mode
The punitive critic mode denigrates and the devalues the individual. It believes the individual deserves to be punished when they do something wrong. Indicators of the punitive critic include clients sharing that they dislike or hate themselves and have strong feelings of dislike or disgust for their child self and their childhood needs.
In the early phases of therapy, to help clients become aware of the impact of the punitive critic mode on the vulnerable child mode, I like this chair-work exercise described by Rosi Reubsaet in her book, Schema Therapy – A Phase Oriented Approach.
1. Get two chairs ready
2. Client sits on the critic mode chair and says one or two of the messages the critic mode says to the vulnerable child (VC). Messages should be directed towards the VC chair in the tone of voice and with the body language of the critic.
3. Client then swaps to the chair of the VC (therapist directs them to focus on their feelings) and therapist sits on the critic mode chair and repeats the messages of the critic to the VC.
4. Therapist returns to own seat and asks the client how they feel about the critic messages and what physical sensations they noticed.
5. The client then returns to their own chair and therapist and client discuss what a good parent might do or say to oppose the critic messages and support the VC. The messages of support are written on one side of a card and the messages to oppose the critic are written on the other.
The Demanding Critic Mode
The demanding critic pushes and pressurises the individual to always be the best, achieve success and never to make mistakes or fail. This critic mode particularly draws on comparisons with others to measure their achievements or successes. Working hard to achieve is always prioritised over rest and pleasure.
The critic mode might be made up of internalised demanding messages from a significant adult in childhood or the high demands modelled by parents who overworked, for example.
When clients are a little further along in their schema therapy journey and well aware of their demanding critic mode and the negative consequences on their life, I like this exercise by Farrell, Reiss and Shaw from their book, The Schema Therapy Clinician’s Guide. It focuses on reducing the influence of the demanding critic mode by re-writing the rules it sets.
1. Write out the Commandments of the Demanding Critic Mode
· You must look perfect
· You must home cook meals for your children every day
· You must make the most sales at work
· Your must earn more money than your friends
2. Create a poster with the Guidelines of your Health Adult Mode
· Rest and play are as important as work
· Good enough is good enough
· It’s good to have fun whilst you work
· Prioritise connecting with family over earning the most money
3. Check out how your client feels about these new messages and where they can display their poster to remind them of their new healthy messages.
The Guilt Inducing Critic
The high demands of the guilt inducing critic focus on meeting the needs of other people over the personal needs of the individual. Disappointing, upsetting or angering others by expressing needs and feelings is not allowed and seen as selfish. Guilt inducing beliefs may have been internalised from implicit messages such as parents looking upset if a child behaved in a particular way. Explicit messages where the child was praised for looking after others and shutting down their own needs, are also likely to contribute.
I love the power of imagery rescripting for helping clients see the impact of the implicit and explicit messages they received as a child that built their guilt inducing critic mode. The aim is to protect a space for the feelings and needs of the child and relieve them of any age inappropriate responsibilities.
1. Support your client to connect to early memories associated with the guilt inducing critic by connecting a present day trigger with the past via an affect bridge or float back.
2. After connecting with the image help the child understand how they feel with the weight of responsibility placed on them. Teach them about what they need including freedom to have fun and to share their feelings with others.
3. Label the behaviours and messages from the adult that make the child feel responsible and guilty. For example, ‘you look so hurt when little Tom wants to go and play with his friends, this makes him feel so guilty for wanting to go out’.
4. Put empathic but firm boundaries in place with the person placing the guilt inducing messages on the child, particularly if they have their own emotional vulnerabilities the child feels responsible for managing.
5. Get the parent/carer some adult help to manage their problems, whilst communicating to the child that the responsibilities placed on them are too much and too heavy.
6. Encourage fun and letting go towards the end of the imagery if appropriate.
Limited Re-Parenting
A final word for this post on limited re-parenting: the most powerful tool of schema therapy. Limited reparenting can be weaved into every interaction with your client and is a potent antidote to the critic mode. If your client has a very punitive critic, be explicit about your positive regard for them. If a demanding critic influences your client’s thinking all the time then pay close attention to the impact it might be having on homework tasks and exercises in sessions. When the guilt inducing critic is very powerful it’s helpful to invite your client to share things that they worry might upset you, especially anger.
To work towards the goal of reducing the influence and power of the critic modes, schema therapy offers experiential exercises and the limited reparenting relationship. These critic modes are powerful and it’s the accumulation of messages to undermine the critic over many weeks which will help you reach this goal with you clients.
If you would like to deepen your knowledge about the three critic modes and how to use imagery to reduce the critic’s power and influence, my popular webinar is for sale "Schema Focused Imagery with the Critic". Further details about the workshop and how to purchase can be found here: